Tuesday, May 3, 2011

i'm slightly crazy, its fine.

i do not handle change well, or at all for that matter. it makes my stomach all twisty and i have uneasy feelings about life. i get all sorts of uncomfortable and don't know which way is up and which way is down. my anixety reaches a new level of high and my emotions get in the way of logic. i get nervous when i know change is approaching and i try to avoid it at all possible costs.

i have a fear of change. i like things to stay the way they are. i don't like to think of the outcome of new situations, and if i do, they are on the negative side of the spectrum. even the tiniest of things set this absurd fear off, such as a new seat in class, i don't like new seats. i liked my old one thank you. or when a teacher decides to mix things up a bit, i don't handle things like that well.

so you can only imagine how much of a mess i was when i walked into wal-mart, destination photo printing center in mind and the first thing i see is the quilting, artsy crafty type items where the greeting cards and cosmetics used to be. first things out of my mouth, what the (explicit word) is going on here. (i'm trying not to swear, it is a bad habit of mine, forgive me.) as i tried to ignore the awkwardly placed fabric cutting table and make my way to the back, everything was out of place. i couldn't even find the photo printer. it doesn't have a home yet, i had to ask if it was available for my use. so inconvenient wal-mart employees is what i would like to tell them. they have lost myself as a customer, which is sad because i love wal-mart. but i don't want to adjust to the new set up. i don't like it. i like it the way it was. i knew where everything was and didn't look like a lost puppy trying to find my way home. as far as i'm concerned, they shouldn't have done the redecorating. it was nice just the way it was.

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